guilt?

i have had lingering flashes of thought in my tiny little head for several years now; i have mentioned this in passing to several friends and i have no idea why i still have flashes of this memory – i played doctor with the boy across the street (older than me) and the girl across the street (younger). i just had another thought that i don’t think i’ve had before – which was about that girl… i had never been reminded of what happened with her and although my role was passive i have to wonder if she is plagued by strange memories (of violation?) as i am. i can’t honestly say that i feel remorse at this point but now that i have traced this feeling further i hope that i am on the right path. i had no idea you were such an inspirational conversation partner, diary.