but we have become more distant since our last visit than before. i know that patience is my friend, but it is difficult when you adore affection.

Seeing Eriko after these four months of almost no communication has so far been what I feared – she is distant and I am distressed. I am torn by my desire for affection and my desire not to rush her into that affection. Last night, I couldn’t sleep and I finally woke her up and asked to kiss her – but it didn’t really make me feel much better. Who wants to ask for a kiss rather than be offerred?

i elected to keep Bailey confined in the condo for two weeks instead of risking her security and the security of the building.

it is strange knowing that you will change but not knowing how or when. even the why isn’t quite clear yet.

I was awakened last night by some strange moaning noise. I left my bed and as I exited the bedroom and rounded the corner, I saw at least two animal shapes on the floor. They immediately scrambled to exit it as quickly as possible, claws scratching at the floor. It was quite awakening. To the best of my knowledge, it was Bailey and an orange cat – at least I observed the two of them sitting on the lawn after the incident.