Sunday arrived at the airport and spent the evening with Eriko and her family. any questions i had about how to bring up our marriage were answered immediately. as soon as i walked into the kitchen, her mom read to me a few sentences she had translated. Monday it was Eriko’s birthday and she had a surprisingly high number of things scheduled. i watched her attend a Kimono-wearing class, went to the bank, post-office, and then a tea ceremony class.

when i am finally at peace with myself, i will die.

i have to wonder whether i really want a PhD in math or whether i’m just a desperado, wishing for that which i don’t have

of course, once my brain starts analyzing a point, it cannot stop until it has come up with some theories. i have two as a consequence: i like positions of authority: a husband, a dad, a manager, a professor. i think too much, often confusing myself. i need to focus on subjects with clear cut answers – mathematics. computer science is halfway there, but there are lots of different ways to do things and still arrive at the same result.

in writing to Susie, i always end up expressing myself in some way or another. i have no idea about the accuracy of such statements, but they flow like water with no resistance. i think the reason why i’m having a mid-life crisis is because i look at where i am now and i extrapolate it to 15 or 20 years and i don’t find happiness there. slaving away for 10+ hours a day on the computer doesn’t give me a warm fuzzy feeling.

i have a desire to write a detailed report of the last few days, but no time nor energy to do it. so i’ll just give the highlights: Saturday: changed front brakes on the Miata with Aaron’s assistance, then had Indian food with Aaron and his fiance Carol Sunday: watched a Mariner’s game and then went to Neal’s housewarming party. both were enjoyable. (Mariner’s game was on TV). Monday: long day at work followed by Japanese class.